The Caine Mutiny



During the 1970 Med deployment the Nasty Nan was a day out of Malta and too many days out of the previous port, because supplies were low, including ice cream.

There was no ice cream in the main galley and no ice cream in the ward room galley, but there was half a drum of strawberry ice cream left in the captain's galley, guarded over by one very short steward. And a few junior officers had a hankering for ice cream like dogs on a meat wagon. The scene was set, like the perfect storm, it would be the perfect crime.

As the J.O.'s towered over the diminutive steward, while Bullet Bob was on the bridge, with threats of "no liberty", the fear of self preservation overcame the steward's allegiance to the captain. And the J.O.'s smuggled the drum of strawberry ice cream down ladders and along companionways to a stateroom.

Next scene, visualize melting strawberry ice cream dripping from the chins of the greedy, gorging J.O.'s while evidence splattered on their khakis and gold and silver bars. Maybe the fools were motivated by the scene on the USS Caine when Captain Queeg (Humphrey Bogart) is characteristically rolling the ball bearings in his hand, demanding to know who stole his strawberries.

As the Nasty Nan tied up to the fuel dock in Malta on a beautiful summer day, the crew gathered at quarters ready to flee on liberty. Bullet Bob addressed his troops on the 1MC with a disturbing note about an act of insolence and disrespect involving his personal provisions, and that liberty would be canceled until the guilty party fessed up...prompting loud groaning from the cargo deck. Apparently the steward feared a call to the Immigration Office more than a berating by Bullet Bob, and until this day the i.d.'s of the guilty have been kept secret.

Meanwhile several of the J.O.'s wives had traveled to Malta to carry out the usual newly-wed connubial activities and were waiting on the dock as Captain Queeg/Brady announced the cancellation of liberty. The captain underestimated the wrath of horny young women. It didn't take long for the newly-weds to march up the brow and bang on the captain's door, demanding a meeting.

Within an hour an announcement was made on the 1MC, "Now Liberty Call".


Submitted by Charles "Chick" Pyle, R Division Officer, 69-71



back